growing pains
My job, and my passion, is to sit with people who are suffering. The suffering takes many forms: the heartbreak of a failing marriage, the fear of a child’s drug addiction, the shame of sexual abuse, the pain of depression. At some point during a client’s treatment and recovery, I am asked, “Why? Why do I have to feel this pain? Why do I have to go through this horrible experience?" At the appropriate time, I gently offer the possibility that there is meaning to all of our su
weathering the storm: part 3
So the storm has arrived, and you’re in the midst of it. A friend or family member is hurt, angry, and/or stirring up discord for you and others. Now what? The answer to that question depends somewhat on the characteristics of your particular storm, but many of them involve one or more the following:
• anger, hostility, yelling
• accusations of mistreatment, or blaming
• unwillingness to take personal responsibility for one’s behaviors
• inappropriate or offensive comment
weathering the storm: part 2
Earlier this week, I wrote to you about the hurricanes and storms of life that involve hurt feelings, unwanted drama, and broken relationships. We can identify the hurricanes, but we can’t always avoid them. So how do we prepare for that inevitable storm that’s headed our way? The first step is to know your personal boundaries. Know what you will, and will not, tolerate from others in your life. Maybe you’ve never considered having boundaries before: “They’re family. I should
weathering the storm: part I
I've been thinking a lot about hurricanes this past week, and talking with clients about them. Not like the hurricane that hit the Gulf Coast, although the kind of hurricane I'm speaking of can also have many devastating consequences. I'm speaking of the "hurricanes" of difficult people, challenging relationships, or dysfunctional family dynamics that we all must deal with on occasion. Just like a weather forecaster, each of us can detect the stirring of the atmosphere in our